Thursday, June 1, 2023

Delivered from Bondage and New Age Deception

I would like to share with you the testimony of one of the Kenyan students in our discipleship training school called Doulos Training School. She recently came back to the Lord following nine years of backsliding in sin after she initially came to the Lord in 2002. Here is the testimony in her own words:

The Testimony of Mwendwa
Born in the early 80s, my childhood was traumatic -- riddled with chaos, sadness, torment, and despair occasioned by living with an abusive alcoholic father. My father committed suicide when I was 17, while my own first suicide attempt was at the age of 15. I struggled with severe clinical depression, low self-esteem, rejection, self-hate, OCD, social anxiety, fear, suicidal attempts and ideations, and sexual bondage from my early teen years to my late twenties. 

I first got born again at age 20 alone at home, in 2002 after an abortion which left me guilty and filled with torment. I backslid two years later however without a foundation of the truth of God and always feeling not good enough and rejected even in church. I got pregnant at age 22. At age 29 after years of severe sexual sin, depression and constant suicidal ideations, I cried out to God in repentance in my bedroom as I could not go on any longer as I had been and he set free instantly from all my sin. I got active in a local church in worship team and teaching Sunday school, and also had my own ministry to the poor slum women and feeding street boys.

Sadly, five years in 2014 later following a series of bad experiences with cults and false churches with false teachings, and being dismissed from the church I served as a leader in for questioning some of the things being done, I was tired and disillusioned and kissed formal religion goodbye opting to follow Jesus away from organized Christianity. However, isolated, wounded, and alone I found myself an easy prey to the devil. I got sexually manipulated by an apostle who took advantage of my vulnerable state, and this filled me with deep self-condemnation and I stopped reading the bible and praying, and eventually found myself back to the sins of my past worse than before, effectively opening the door to Satan's deceptions.

I began accepting and embracing new-age spiritual beliefs which seemed to offer me some semblance of a relationship with God since I no longer identified as a Christian. Over the next 9 years, these new age beliefs had taken deep hold of me and I became a 'spiritual' teacher in the metaphysical, law of attraction, and new thought community. I published 3 books and had clients and a growing following on social media. My new beliefs were a mixture of Gnosticism, Hinduism, Buddhism, eastern philosophy, and mystical Christianity. I had embraced beliefs such as non-dualism, reincarnation, Christ-consciousness, and oneness, and believed all paths led to God. I thought I had found the ultimate truth but was deeply deceived.

As a ‘spiritual’ teacher I had also gradually developed a drinking problem and by 2022 was a full-blown alcoholic unable to save myself despite years of trying everything I could. My spiritual beliefs could not save me. I knew only Jesus could help me, and I cried out to him for help over and over. Finally at my lowest point when I felt I would surely die and gave up on all self-help, the Lord Jesus set me free instantly and miraculously in rehab. In rehab I began to study the teachings of Jesus in the bible daily, desiring the truth. The spiritual deception took longer to be free from because I still believed I was on the right path. However, Jesus was slowly opening my blinded eyes.

By April 2023 the word of God and the grace of the Lord Jesus had done their work and opened my eyes it seemed almost overnight to see how greatly deceived I had been. Through a convicting work only the Holy Spirit can perform, I was shown the depth of my deception for those 9 years and how I had turned to other gods. It felt like I had woken up from a deep sleep. I truly was the prodigal son. I had wasted all I had in prodigal living. Jesus said that the prodigal son "came to himself", and said, "I will arise and go to my father." Jesus opened my eyes, set me free from years of sin and deception, and revived my first love for him which had been lost. (Revelations 2:4)

Through godly sorrow and repentance, I knew I had to leave my old life behind completely. It was clear I could not maintain my old life and a walk with Jesus. In obedience, I left it all behind to follow Jesus (Luke 5:11). This included pulling down my books from Amazon, my old social media accounts, and all my articles on my website. I also made a public confession to my followers on social media and to my clients making it clear I could no longer teach what I had been.

It was not easy and there were many consequences to this change-financially, socially, and emotionally. Sin and rebellion always have consequences. But Jesus promised to be with me always if I obeyed him and he has.

Jesus has changed my life. I now truly understand the Grace of God. The old self-righteousness and works-based Christian life that always led to condemnation, frustration, and backsliding was been exposed. I finally realized that I cannot please God through my own efforts, and my efforts cannot save me. It is all by the Grace of God, and only by looking to Jesus Christ am I sustained. My salvation is the work of God. It is he and he alone who opened my eyes when I was greatly deceived, it was all him and none of me. I am grateful for his mercy, long-suffering, and kindness. He did not allow me to die and perish in my pitiful state. I was dead and now am alive again, was blind but now I see. All my life I felt not good enough and had adopted a performance mindset even with my relationship with Jesus, but now for the first time I feel truly accepted in the beloved without the need to DO things to be loved by the Father, but instead overflowing with good works as a response to his love, and not to gain his love.

END OF MWENDWA'S TESTIMONY

Closing Words
I trust that this testimony has blessed you by the power of the Holy Spirit. If you have been in a similar situation to hers, I strongly encourage you to repent and ask the Lord to forgive you and set you free, trusting Him to do so in a very powerful way.

Author's Note: If you enjoyed this post, you may also like to read The Truth Set Me FreeMy Overflowing Joy in Knowing Jesus, and Lifted Out of a Slimy Pit, which are the testimonies of myself and two of my other children. Also see the Home page of this blog for more testimonies. You are invited to view my collection of blogs at Writing for the Master.

Do You Want to Know Him?
If you want to know Jesus personally, you can. It all begins when you repent and believe in Jesus.  Do you know what God's Word, the Bible says?

“Jesus came into Galilee, preaching the gospel of God, and saying, ‘The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand; repent and believe in the gospel.’” (Mar 1:14b-15).  He preached that we must repent and believe. 

Please see my explanation of this in my post called "Do You Want to Know Jesus?"

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Len Lacroix is the founder of Doulos Missions International.  He was based in Eastern Europe for four years, making disciples, as well as helping leaders to be more effective at making disciples who multiply, developing leaders who multiply, with the ultimate goal of planting churches that multiply. His ministry is now based in the United States with the same goal of helping fulfill the Great Commission. www.dmiworld.org. 

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